When co-parents live in different cities, states or even countries, creating a workable parenting time schedule is generally far more challenging than it might otherwise be. Unlike local custody arrangements, long-distance parenting requires thoughtful planning to facilitate meaningful parent-child relationships while minimizing stress and disruption for the child who is – at least to some degree – “caught in the middle.”
If you and your child’s other parent do not live locally to one another, and you’re struggling to figure out how to make a parenting time schedule work for your family, know that it is possible to craft truly manageable arrangements. You might have to get creative and remain somewhat flexible, but this is a “doable” family scenario.
Common long-distance parenting schedules
There is no one-size-fits-all schedule for co-parents who live far apart. The best arrangement for any particular family depends on factors such as a child’s age, school schedule, financial/travel constraints and the distance between parents’ homes. With that said, common options worth considering include:
Extended Holiday and Summer Parenting Time
- The child lives with one parent during the school year and spends longer periods (weeks or months) with the other parent during school breaks.
- This is common when the parents live in different states or several hours apart.
- Holiday time is often split between parents to allow for extended parenting time stretches with both families in ways that allow memories to be made “on both sides.”
One Weekend a Month and Alternating Holidays
- If travel is manageable, one parent may have one full weekend per month, along with alternating holidays and part of summer vacation.
- Some co-parents meet halfway to reduce travel burdens or use flights when driving is not an option.
Every Other Month or Seasonal Parenting Time
- In some cases, parents alternate longer stretches of parenting time every other month or seasonally, meaning the child spends a few months at a time with each parent.
- This arrangement may work better for older children who can handle longer periods away from their primary home.
One of these approaches may work well for your family. Or perhaps a hybrid or bespoke approach will prove to be the most manageable. No matter where you land, know that by including virtual visitation provisions in your parenting plan, remaining reasonable and focusing on your child’s best interests, you’ll remain empowered to make a long-distance parenting time schedule work for everyone affected.